Author: Elise Patkotak

Today my friend Grace becomes officially very old. I, of course, am younger than her by almost a full two months so I’m not officially very old yet. Grace and I have been friends since we were 3 years old growing up next door to each other. Which makes it even funnier when we get into conversations now and instead of talking boys or kids, we talk about our latest doctor visits and which parts of our bodies are, or are not, falling apart.

Grace now has a wandering toe issue. I have a wandering endocrine system. We all have Continue reading →

Meet the newest member of my family. Her name is Nayla and she is 8 yrs. old and weighs about 8 pounds. She is my favorite breed… rescue!

Carm is pretty ok with this. So long as he’s on his pain meds, he’s really ok with just about anything.

Snowy’s nose, on the other hand, is way out of joint. He and Nayla circle each other looking for an opening to steal whatever toy the other one has. I find this highly amusing. It keeps Snowy occupied so he doesn’t bother Carm. And as sweet as Nayla is… and she Continue reading →

Wow. In a two day period I heard that a dear friend from Barrow is being treated for lung cancer, an attorney I knew from the borough… one of the sweetest men ever… died recently and the vet who has held my hand through so many painful partings with my little family almost died of a heart problem on Sunday.

I’m sitting here stunned. How am I still alive and that attorney is dead? How do I have a relatively healthy heart and that young vet almost dies in his bed? How do I, a committed smoker for over twenty Continue reading →

Every day I check my website for comments. And every day, amidst the comments from actual people, I receive at least ten spams from someone trying to sell me Viagra on the cheap. No one is trying to spam me over birth control pills. But Viagra… dear lord. I realize that for some men the ability to get and sustain an erection is the definition of their manhood but honestly guys, women aren’t that shallow. We also like other things that don’t depend on a pill to achieve. Sometimes we just want you to listen or hold us or help Continue reading →

I love it when it snows. I love it even more when it snows and I don’t have to go anywhere or do anything but sit in my chair and watch white fluff fall from the sky.

But each year driving in those white out conditions gets harder and each year it seems that Anchorage gets a little slower in plowing the roads so that there is some semblance of a lane available to the human eye.

On Thursday, amidst the first real snow of our season, I drove to my doctor’s office. My appointment was after 11 AM so Continue reading →

Time has passed and I still feel as though I can never reconcile the presidency of the Orangeman to my belief in America. I cannot look at people who actually voted for him and are proud to admit it the same way I did before the election. And mostly, I have had it with the assholes who keep telling me to get over it and back him because he is our president. This from the same people who announced their one and only goal during the Obama administration was to make Obama a failure. Well folks, it’s like the saying Continue reading →

My body may never again know what time it really is. Day and night are upside down. I want to go to sleep at 3PM and awaken at 1 AM.  Most of my friends are not amused when I call to see if they want to go to lunch at 4 AM. When I was younger, this was a whole lot easier. Continue reading →

My dogs will not move two inches from my side. My birds call every time I walk by, begging for a little scratch on the head and words telling them they are the most beautiful birds in the world. My suitcase is emptied and put away for a long time to come. And I’ll be calling Korean VIP for my takeout tofu stew, my comfort treat on returning home. Life is good. Continue reading →