My friend Grace turns a very old age today. I can say this because she will turn that age before I will by about two months. We’ve been friends since we were about 3 and I spent a good deal of our childhood jealous that she got to do everything first because she was older. I no longer think that way.
Scribblings
Is it just me or…
Whenever I see Ben Carson I feel like I’m watching a Saturday Night Live skit and at any moment it will end and he’ll open his eyes and be a normal human being. Because if this is really him as he is… WOW!
Jery Falwell Jr.
Asking all the students at his university to carry concealed weapons so as to fight off anyone trying to shoot them. Yep, what could go wrong… guns in the hands of young men who are still in the midst of impulsive behavior. And, of course, it being a Christian university, no one would ever drink at a party and use the guns inappropriately. This man is truly an idiot.
Dog love
Here’s how you know you’re a real dog lover. You wake up to your dog standing on your chest and exhaling his overwhelmingly fishy breath into your face and you find yourself smiling and hugging him.
That man who wears an orange cat on his head
The national news outlets report that Donald Trump’s numbers have fallen into the low 30% and view this as good since he is down from the 40% or so he’d been polling. And all I can think is, “In what world is it good news the 30% of Americans think Donald Trump is qualified for anything other than looking for a new wife since his current one must be close to her mid thirties and that puts her in the too old range for him?”
Murres
I don’t know how the national news is not yet covering this. Murres, a sea bird, are dying at record numbers in California, washing ashore starved to death. Here in Alaska, Bird TLC has had over 30 admitted in the past few weeks, all starving, and none of them anywhere near where they should have been.
So what’s happening? And why isn’t the national news interested? Oh, that’s right. No Kardashian is involved.
How do people without pets do it?
As I lay in bed last night, warmed by the two little doggies bodies curled up close against me, I wondered again how people without pets survive. Kids and spouses may be ok substitutes but they will never equal the real thing.
Thanksgiving Eve
As of midnight tonight, we officially enter the guilt free zone of Thanksgiving eating. May your pants be tight, your stomach be full and your smile be as broad as can be when you rise from your holiday table. And remember, neither carbs, nor fats, nor sugars matter on Thanksgiving. On this one day each year, they all come with only positive health benefits.
Just a heads up to all Alaska drivers
Putting your turn signal on AFTER you have squeezed in front of me to pull into my lane despite the snow and ice making the distance between us NOT SAFE, it doesn’t count! Turn signals, as their name implies, signals you want to turn. Put it on BEFORE you turn, you asshole!
Who’s with me on this?
If we elect Donald Trump, aside from throwing up in our mouths every time we say the words “President Trump”, we’ll save on a whole salary since that thing living on his head can be his VP. I mean, seriously, who would want to be his running mate?