Author: admin

Whenever I despaired that true love and happiness could never last a lifetime, I thought of my friends Ken and Rob. They spent 30 years being each other’s best friend, laughing and loving each other with a respect and gentleness I could only ever envy. And now some sleepy driver who didn’t see the flashing lights has killed Ken. And all I can think is that it’s just not fair.  Love like that should be kept in this world because it makes the world a little kinder, a little nicer, a little easier to handle. I know their love will

My friend tells me that such a thing exists but the drawback is that the sugar free part has a laxative effect.  Hell, that’s part of the draw for me.  Eat it, pass it, no weight gain but all the fun.

Do you remember when everyone you knew over sixty had dentures? It was just a fact of lif – the glass on the table next to the bed with the teeth soaking in them. Now I don’t know anyone over sixty with dentures outside of Bush Alaska…which is a whole other story. I’m guessing this is a story of dental success that someone should be writing about. I’m sure glad I don’t have to take my teeth off at night – though I am happier and happier to take my bra off.

I’m a diabetic now so all I can do is dream about the handfuls of candy corn I used to gulp down without a second thought. Would that some candy manufacturer could find a way to make sugar free candy corn. Now there’s someone I could salute.

OK, now I’m begging. Please stop me before I go into a Costco again. Do an intervention. Tackle me at the one yard line.  Take my car keys away. Hell, take my car away.  But stop me.

And now, the question that must be asked. Does anyone out there need 300 sponges?

Quick…for Halloween…most scary face….Dick Cheney smiling or Barbara Bush with any expression?

It must be winter. My studded snow tires AND the cleats for my shoes are both back in daily use.  Wouldn’t it be nice if we could have the snow without the ice? the cold without the frigid cold? the dark season with some light? But then again, if we had those things, what would Alaskans have to bitch/brag about?

My wireless mouse started acting all ragged and jerky. It kept freezing up the minute I wasn’t using it. So I cleaned out the contact points, reloaded the software, muttered about people who might have used my computer while I was out and downloaded something that was conflicting with it, decided that the MacGame I tried to buy had a virus and finally resorted to beating it on the table.  Turns out it needed new batteries. Such old fashioned technology for such new fangled stuff.

When your own generals blast the way you’ve conducted your war, it’s time for a decent man to resign and go back to what he does best…clearing brush in Texas. Oh wait, that’s right, he’s not a decent man.

Our latest trial of corrupt politicians continues apace here while back in my childhood state of New Jersey, Atlantic City politicians fall faster than trees in the South American rain forests. Who will win? Which state will come out on top with the most corruption in public life? Will it be perennial favorite New Jersey, home of some of the best corruption this side of Russia?  Or Alaska, that scrappy up and comer who is trying so hard to beat the old pros? Stay tuned. It can only get better.