My friend Sandra turns fifty today. She is very, very old. You now need to treat her gently and make sure to yell into her good ear when talking to her. Thank god she’s aging faster than me or her turning 50 would mean I was older than dirt.
Tibet
It was sometime in the early or mid nineties. My sister and I were in a Tibetan monastery outside of Lhasa. We were there only because the Chinese government realized it could not subsidize this region forever. Tibet needed to contribute to the national coffers. So China allowed some monasteries to reopen as a draw for tourists.
We sat in front of a shrine of Buddha. Tucked in every nook and crevice in the wall behind the Buddha were pictures of the Dalai Lama. A very old monk brought us each a cup of yak butter tea. Maybe it was
What is it with these spammers?
What is it with spammers and my website? Seriously, what is it???? What is attracting them? Or is it the story of my life…I’m just one of many convenient sites so they might as well try me when they try all the others. I mean, seriously, that pretty much defines my dating life back when I had one. And now they’re hitting on my site instead of me. Sigh. I guess that’s progress. Better my website than me.
Another reason I love Alaska
As I was leaving Providence Hospital after visiting a friend, I noticed a note taped to the exit doors. It read simply, “Watch out for moose”. Immediately outside the exit door was a very large mound of moose nuggets. And I thought again how hard it would be to live anywhere else in the world.
A new definition of drug filled evening
When I was young, a drug fueled evening of debauchery meant pot and lots of munchies. Now, when I really want a drug filled evening of debauchery, I take Advil PM and some tums. Ah old age……
When I was little
When I was little, my mother bought me a coconut cream filled white chocolate Easter egg for my Easter basket every year. It even had yellow food dye in the middle to resemble the yolk. I don’t remember who made them, could have been Russell Stover. I do know that if I was given one now, I’d fall face first into it, eat it till I went into a diabetic coma, and then die happy.
Such are the fantasies of an aging diabetic with much too much time on her hands.
Proof again that my thumb is not green
This was the first year that I over-wintered my fuchsias in my garage in an attempt to save the money it would have cost to over-winter them in a nursery. So I took them out of the garage when the gardening columnist said I should. I watered them and put them in a light filled, sunny room. And the only things growing are weeds. Isn’t that amazing? Even in a flower pot in my house, I grow weeds. As for the fuchsias, well, let’s just say that they make very pretty and decorative pieces of wood sticking up from the
In a fair world….
George Clooney would be made king of America and then we wouldn’t have to worry about a leader for the next fifty years. Even if he made you mad with what he did, he’d at least be cute to look at.
It’s not a surplus if you have a debt
When my mom died, my sister, brother and I cleared out some closets in the back of what had been our family grocery store. In one, I found the old ledger book that my father used to keep his finances straight when he ran the store.
Back then the only computer available was in his head. And despite the fact that math has always been a skill glaring in its absence among me and my siblings, the one skill that seems to have survived through multiple generations was the ability to add and subtract in our heads. Granted, calculators have
I may not shop often but….
…when the bug hits, I do major damage. Which is my excuse and defense for driving into the Subaru dealership last week to get my car its sixty thousand mile checkup and driving out in a new used car. Impulse buying is not a good thing when you are standing in a car dealership. On the other hand, you literally have to shove a Subaru off a cliff or shoot it to kill it so I justify this on the basis of the fact that I won’t need to buy another one for twenty years. I also won’t be able