There’s a reason plumbers get paid more per hour than I can ever hope to see in this lifetime or the next as a writer. It’s because you can apparently survive without your morning paper during that brief morning interlude on the toilet before the day begins in earnest. You may be bored, but you’ll survive. On the other hand, if that toilet isn’t working…well, there you have it. That’s why they get paid so well. And are so worth it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a morning paper to peruse.