Sadomasochism my way

Get into your loosest, oldest, rattiest bathrobe, get under a blanket on your couch, spread a kitchen towel across your chest and eat nachos with homemade guacamole while watching the SAG Awards followed by the US Figure Skating Championships. Yep, a few hours of watching people whose total body weight is significantly less than what you carry around your belly is not the way to feel good about yourself. Especially when the women use less material in their whole dress than you use for your skivvies.

And yes, I am well aware of the irony of this self awareness achieved while eating nachos.