What do I have to do?

What do I have to do to get Trader Joe’s to come to Alaska? Because I’ll do it. And I do mean I’ll do anything. It’s simply not fair that they aren’t here. Do they not know how much Alaskans eat and how much that would translate into food sales for them? Anchorage alone could increase their profit margin by 100%. And it’s a win-win because Alaskans would not get fat on what Trader Joe sells since it is all that healthy, organic crap that they’ve somehow made tantalizingly delicious.

So again I ask… what do I have to do?