Grateful things

Here are the things I think we should be thankful for this holiday season. First and foremost, thank you Covid 19. Because of you I do not have to stress over holiday meals with family and/or friends I may or may not like. Seriously, if I don’t want to see them in June, why would I suddenly want to see them in November or December?

I think we also need to send thanks to – yes, this is not a misprint – Donald Trump. While some think he may have been responsible for over 300,000 deaths in America from Covid 19, on the other hand, he kept up amused between Tiger King’s ending and the beginning of Queen’s Gambit with his increasingly insane tweets. And before we leave the subject of the Queen’s Gambit, may I just note that it actually moved slower than The Crown, and I thought the British had the corner on ponderous dramas.

I think we need to be thankful that Don Young won re-election. This means he will leave the state and not return for another two years during which time we can pretend we simply don’t have a representative in DC.  Let’s face it, pretending we don’t have a representative in DC is much less embarrassing that admitting it’s Don Young. And with 435 seats in the House of Representatives, how much harm can he really do? So, let the old man slumber for another couple of years. It’s the Christian thing to do.

I am grateful this year for Melania’s White House decorations. I was worried after the blood red Christmas that all following Christmases would just get darker and darker. Do I think she is perhaps overcompensating? Well, it does look like Christmas threw up all over the White House this year but that’s better than it looking like Satan bled all over it. And given that I have friends and relatives whose houses at Christmas make the White House decorations this year look subdued; I’m not going to say anything more.

Closer to home, I am grateful to our two US senators for proving once again that they are all I thought they were. Lisa has brought handwringing to a level of art form never previously seen, and Sullivan has proven he is one of Trump’s most trusted sycophants. But not, may I add, a more trusted and aspiring sycophant than Alaska’s current governor. My theory is that Dunleavy has spent so much time kissing Trump’s butt because he was hoping for a job in a second Trump term. I figure he joined the Texas lawsuit in an attempt to revive that possibility. Though it has to be said that on Dec. 10 he conceded that Biden might have an outside chance of becoming president. Yep, that’s the kind of deep thinking and intelligent statement that we have all come to expect from this man.

On a non-political level, I am thrilled that a vaccine against Covid is coming sooner rather than later. I can again dream of a day when I walk into a store and don’t have to read the labels through the steam on my glasses. Though to be honest, that will also mean I’ll have to come up with another reason for being a hermit. Covid was so easy to blame.

I’m grateful for the friends who have helped me through this by getting groceries and meds for me, taking me to medical appointments, and just calling to make sure I wasn’t dead on the floor with the dogs eating my rotting corpse… and yes, I have no doubt they would. Loyalty, as some on the right are finding out, only goes so far.

So yeah, on the face of it 2020 was one of the worse years of your life. Everything you loved changed – you couldn’t go shopping, couldn’t go to the movies, couldn’t go to bars or restaurants – you couldn’t do all those things that had once filled your life. But think of the things you learned to do to fill your day. Baking bread. Beading bags. Painting. Reading. Writing. Daydreaming. The list is as long as your imagination. So maybe it really wasn’t the worse year. Maybe it was the year we all learned something new that will enhance our life in the future.

Hey, I know you won’t ever bake your own bread again after this is over. But I can dream, right?