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My mother raised me well

She taught me about guilt with her mother’s milk. And so now when I get up a little later than usual and find my Stellar Jays sitting in the snow covered trees around my porch waiting for their obviously late breakfast, I feel guilty. I pull boots on over my jammies and trudge onto the snow covered porch to put their peanuts out while shivering in my half-awake state. Only Jewish and Italian mothers are capable of instilling that much guilt into you before you can even walk.