Author: Elise Patkotak

Let’s see if I have this straight.  If you rob a bank, you go to jail. There really is little discussion about that fact. It is usually non-negotiable. Rob a bank, get caught, go to jail. This happens even if you are robbing the bank to pay for your child’s medical needs, your wife’s surgery, to put food on the table or, simply because you are greedy and want more money. Even if you don’t hurt anyone in the robbery, even if the bank is FDIC insured so no customers will lose money… even if all that is true, you Continue reading →

I would have written about the debate earlier but it’s taken the past few days for me to get over that much Trump in one sitting. Well, in actual fact, two seconds of that face, hair and voice and I feel like I’m already overdosed. And putting the TV on mute while he’s speaking doesn’t help. You can still see him.

I am voting the minute early voting opens here so I can cast my vote and move on with the rest of my life. Also, once I’ve voted, I will no longer feel obligated to pay that much attention Continue reading →

44 years ago to the day, I first set foot in Barrow. Having just left NYC two days prior, hitting an Eskimo village at the start of the dark season back when winters in the Arctic were really Arctic winters, I had many serious misgivings about the adventure I’d decided I needed. Clearly that didn’t last long. It took me one day on the tundra to realize I feel more at home there than in any other climate in the world. Yes, I know that’s strange but it’s true. My second day in Barrow I walked through the whole Continue reading →

I tool Abdul, my African Grey, out of his cage and brought him into my office for our alone time away from all those other noisy parrots. I put my feet up and laid back in my chair. He leaned his head down so it was resting on my chest and I scratched his head.
Honestly, I don’t know who was more relaxed, content and happy… me or him. And I didn’t care. It was one of those perfect moments in life where love was enveloping me from the tiny little grey feathered creature snuggling into my chest.

Life doesn’t Continue reading →

44 years ago today I first stepped foot in Alaska. I spent my first two nights in the state at the old ANMC quarters. My poor Adeline was in a carry cage and as unhappy as I was. I cried almost all of the first night. And then I left for Barrow and my life would change forever.

Did I mention that I had announced to everyone at the beginning of this adventure that I would only be gone for two years. I guess I blew that deadline. Continue reading →

Tomorrow’s Alaska Professional Communicator’s luncheon’s guess speaker is, of all things, a philosopher. So, first off to my cousin Joe… see there is a job market for philosophers. And two, who the hell knew that the media had ethics? I thought Fox had made them passe years and years and years ago. Continue reading →

I guess I hadn’t realized how many of the comments this site would receive would be porn spam. I must say that now that I get to review and accept or reject comments based on their subject matter, I have become familiar with a variety of sex… things… that I’d never known were possible before. Maybe my Catholic upbringing was not the right preparation for reviewing porn spam. Continue reading →