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Just so you know

There are rumors floating around that some pet birds can do things like sing and dance that my birds can’t do. I just want to make it clear that it’s not that they can’t do it, it’s that they do not choose to do it. I believe their distaste for performing comes out of the fact that they have had the misfortune to observe the sad results of one of the flock learning how to sing and dance from me. They feel their dignity will not allow them to repeat the activity.

Abdul, my African Gray who knows no better, hangs upside down from the top of his cage swinging in a figure eight pattern while singing Rock Around the Clock. Unfortunately, he learned the song from me. I can neither sing, carry a tune, dance or know the actual words to the song. So while he hangs upside down swinging madly, he is singing in a one word barked monotone, “Rock. Rock. Rock. Rock. Rock.” The other birds laugh at him. He can’t hear that because…did I already mention this…he’s upside down and all his blood has rushed into his ears so all he hears is what he considers his mellifluous voice singing one word over and over and over again.

Yes, my house is strange. But would yours look any more normal if the outside world suddenly peeked in?