Only in Alaska

Only in Alaska where we pay no income tax at all would people complain because this year the state is only sending them a check for $1000 for every man, woman and child who can prove Alaska residency. Make this complaint to someone who lives outside of Alaska where the state not only doesn’t pay them to live there but actually takes money from them in the form of taxes for living there. Alaskans wouldn’t know how to survive that. Continue reading →


Monday presidential debate

I want to watch it but every time I see Trump I throw up a little in my mouth. And then when he starts talking, I find myself picking up heavy objects and heaving them at the tv. So maybe I should just watch NCIS:LA reruns and read about the debates in the paper the next day. Might be safer all around. Continue reading →


Brad, Angie… tell me it isn’t so!

Thank god for Brad and Angelina’s divorce filing. We finally have something to worry about that is worth our worrying. Presidential election? State elections? Wars in the Mid East?  Climate catastrophe facing us down? None of that matters anymore. What really matters is however will Brad get over Angie? Will Jennifer leave her husband and reunite with Brad? Does having millions and millions of dollars make this any easier on those sad little urchins they are raising? Who will Angie turn to for comfort? Her brother? Does she still have that vial of Billy Bob Thornton’s blood? Maybe he’s available? Continue reading →


The real reason Donald Trump

… is at a disadvantage in the upcoming presidential debates:

Because he’s a racist asshole with less intelligence in his entire brain than Hillary has in her left pinky finger.

Whew. I feel better now. I guess I’ve been holding that in for a long time. Continue reading →

Columns 2016

To cut or not to cut the PFD check

Anyone catching even the slightest glimpse of my checkbook knows my ability with finances is, to put it mildly, limited. That I’m able to live on my own and pay my own bills this late in my life is totally due to other people who understand finances and helped me save some of that money flowing so easily through my fingers. So when I talk about our PFD checks, I speak from a human perspective and not a technical knowledge of high finance.

In most of Bush Alaska, a PFD check is treasured. It provides that extra boost that helps Continue reading →


Emmy hangover

Watched the Emmys on Sunday night. Took a full day for my eyes to recover from the glitter and pretty. And after watching it, here’s the question that has to be asked.  Does any actress in Hollywood weigh more than 90 lbs. or is that the cut off weight for actually getting onscreen? The other question I have is who are all those people who won and why have I never watched even one of those shows? It’s all the fault of the Salesian nuns who taught me to love reading. If it weren’t for that, I’d have time for Continue reading →


It’s not funny anymore

For those of us who lived through the sixties, Trump’s offhanded suggestions of violence towards his opponent are simply that step too far. He is no longer the orange clown. He is no longer the little handed man with the overwhelming ego. He is no longer the dad who publicly announces his desire to date his daughter. He is no longer the racist, misogynist blabber of hate. He is no longer even an American. Because no American would suggest, especially not lightly or jokingly, that their opponent be the victim of violence. If this is the only way this little Continue reading →


Why is AOL doing this to me?

OK, first of all, stop laughing. Yes, I said AOL. Get over it. I got my email account in 1992 and I was the first to grab the name TheParrot and I am never giving it up.

Now on to the real issue. Why is there a big picture of OrangeMan in the ad space next to my email? What have I ever said or done to deserve that? I throw up a little in my mouth every time I check my email now. And don’t tell me to go to the ad choices site. I did that and there Continue reading →


OK, I give up

What the hell is vaping?  It is now being offered for pot smoking and I don’t even know what it is for regular smoking. Is this like those alcohol drinks where you just swallow the vapors and not the actual liquid? Oh god, the world is just getting too complicated for me. I think I’ll just pop in a brownie and contemplate how easy life used to be. Continue reading →


Winter is coming

I’ve had to put my furnace on. My raspberry bushes have been cut back. My perennials have been put to bed. The leaves are falling madly off the trees. Let winter begin. I sure in hell didn’t move to Alaska for its summers. And given last winter’s non-winter, I refuse to put snow tires on until I see an actual accumulation of snow that warrants them! Continue reading →