Elise Sereni Patkotak

After Dukakis’ disastrous picture in a helmet during his presidential campaign, you ‘d think most candidates would avoid those photo ops. But here comes an ad for Lisa Murkowski and she’s wearing a hard hat and damned if she doesn’t look good in one. If Dukakis had looked that good in a helmet, Bush 1 might not have wiped the floor with him. 

Newsweek may not think Lisa is “glamorous” a la Our Gal Temporary Sal but she sure does do Alaska glamorous well… I mean, what Alaskan man doesn’t like his woman to be able to wear her hard

I find myself frequently castigated as a liberal by various online commenters.

I don’t think the word liberal is anymore heinous than the word conservative. Both are nothing more than the description of two political philosophies put forth by mostly honorable people who want to achieve what is best for America but differ or how to get there. The fringe in each group does not represent the majority.

What I find amusing is that the same people who hurl that word at me as the basest of epithets seem to think that because I am more liberal than conservative, I

I wonder if it ever occurs to the pope and his bishops and cardinals that the outfits they get to wear on a regular basis are a drag queen’s wet dream? Flowing robes, gold embroidery, pointy hats, red slippers…. OMG – I knew queens back in Brooklyn who would have become priests just for the privilege of wearing that stuff without fear of being arrested for indecent attire. But their standards were too high for the priesthood.

I used to easily pull all nighters in my youth. It occurs to me now that I’ve reached an age where the only way that is apt to happen again is if I’m in a hospital and the nurse is waking me up every 30 minutes to take my vital signs.

Another sign there is no hope for the future of civilization…. there is an actual site on the web entitled, “Celebrities eating”. And yes, it is exactly what it sounds like. Pictures of celebrities eating. Not surprisingly, it turns out they do it with their mouths, just like you and me.

I wish Bristol and Levi all the success in the world in their marriage but…. please, oh please media…. do not force us to live through a barrage of wedding coverage that will make us all want to spit up and hide in holes while plugging our ears… oh wait, I already want to do that because of the political campaigns now being waged so I guess I can just kill two birds with one stone.

I’m sure Mr. James is a very nice and talented man. But really, do we need to treat his decision to play basketball in another town that will pay him more with the same awe, attention and overblown hype as the second coming? Actually, I find myself wondering if the second coming would even get as much attention unless Jesus has recently learned how to jump up and hold on to the rim of the net while doing whatever it is players do while holding on to the rim…. honestly, I’ve never really cared enough to figure it out.

I

After almost forty years in Alaska, I can now say with some certainty that the most important thing I’ve learned is to never mess with a guy’s truck, dog or gun.  His wife and/or girlfriend will simply have to fend for themselves.

I guess it’s the nature of the political beast. In order to win the most votes, you have to say things so vague that the electorate can pretty much read anything they want into it, thereby ensuring that they think you represent them.

Imagine the shock most of us feel when that turns out not to be true.

Let’s take a recent statement uttered by Our Gal, Temporary Sal.  Yes, I know this is like shooting fish in a barrel but she is so good at this stuff that it’s hard not to go to her barrel when looking for

All praise ye, mighty fern. You insist on surviving though planted in the death spot in my yard.  You don’t look as happy as your brethren nearby in the sweet spot. But you bravely hold your head up as high as you can and defy the death spot to defeat you. I salute your courage.