I think all Alaskans should stand together with me and say loudly and proudly, “Our politicians are not as bad as South Carolina’s politicians.” Finally, an issue on which we can be proud to only occupy the number two slot.
Here’s the thing about jail
Despite my family’s greatest fears, I’ve never actually “gone” to jail. But due to the work I do, I’ve visited more jails than I ever wanted to. Here’s what struck me most about them – the clanging doors. I know this sounds like a film cliche but the sound of those doors slamming behind you and automatically locking as you go in deeper and deeper absolutely freaks me out.
Public Floggings
I try very hard to keep a balanced view point on the religion of Islam. But when I read continually about women being routinely flogged for such horrors as wearing slacks in public and drinking a beer in a restaurant, I think that Islam – at least as practiced by many fundamentalist countries in the mid-East and Africa – deserves to disappear from the face of this earth sooner rather than later and the men who follow those beliefs deserve to be banished to a land full of men and only men since they clearly have no right to the
Stellar Jays
I woke up this morning and went to put the dogs out. As I closed the sliding glass porch door, four Jays landed on the railing and stared at me with a look between exasperation and bemusement. Since I’d barely had time to hit the john before letting the dogs out, I ignored them and went to do my morning ablution. I came back to find four Jays lined up at the bottom of the glass door hitting it with their beaks. It was like my own little anvil chorus. I guess I didn’t get their morning peanuts out in
Obama is an other
You want to talk about indoctrination? You want to talk about propaganda? I went to sixteen years of Catholic schooling back in the fifties and sixties when even god was afraid to dispute what Sister Angelina said in the classroom. I know about indoctrination.
When I was a senior in high school, I won a Voice of Democracy Award from the VFW for an essay I wrote. The award ceremony was held in a Protestant church. This freaked me out so badly, my parents had to send me next door to the rectory so Monsignor Vincent could assure me that
And this says all that needs to be said about me and men
The other night my friend Greta came by with her six month old son Joe. Joe’s been sick and had been fussy and cranky. Until I held him. Every time I took him in my arms, he fell asleep. Yep, that about defines my impact on the opposite sex. I put them right to sleep.
Things that frighten me about haute couture
1. The words “haute couture”.
2. I often can’t figure out how one would put the clothing item on.
3. When I can get the same effect by mis-buttoning my sweater and tucking only half of my shirt in, I feel the end of the world is near.
4. The outfit that comes with an umbrella for a hat would only cause my family to pull out the commitment papers again. Not one of them would look at me and think, “My, isn’t she fashionable!”
5. I come from Alaska. When I wear a piece of fur it is to
Who’s raising her kids
If Sarah is so busy outside writing her book and making speeches in Asia, who is raising her kids? You know, the ones who need to be in school in Wasilla? The young ones? Todd is with her. So who’s with them?
Thank god I don’t have children…
… because if my animals are any example, the kids would be spoiled rotten. I’ve noticed that if I don’t get up to put peanuts out on the deck for the Stellar Jay’s when they come by, they’ll sit on the deck chair waiting for me. And if I don’t arrive by the time they think I should, they’ll come down to the fence outside my office window and sit there staring at me as I work at the computer until I stop, go upstairs, put the peanuts out, wait for them to get them all (what with bears, I
A wisdom from the perspective of age
If you wear a shirt big enough, and your breasts are small enough, you can address a crowd and they will never notice you are not wearing a bra.