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Had that dream again

Had that dream again about the captain of Serenity.  I don’t know his name and don’t want to because if I did, I’d feel obligated to send him a note of apology for being possibly the dirtiest old lady he will ever have the privilege of knowing…if only in her dreams.

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March Madness Alaska style

My house is full of Barrow people down for the state basketball championships.  Barrow boys lost but the Barrow girls are still in the scramble for the title. So the excitement continues and I can’t turn a corner in town without seeing a familiar face from home down for the games.  Meanwhile, poor Mr. T cowers on the stairs afraid to navigate the downstairs sitting room to get to his office pillow because the room is occupied by three wonderful but active young boys and their dad and Mr. T is just not sure at all that this is safe

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Please god make it stop

For some reason yesterday I thought of the song “It’s A Small World” and now I can get it out of my mind. It repeats and repeats and repeats. I try to drown it out with Jimmy Buffet but within seconds the refrain reasserts itself right over the words, “Why don’t we get drunk and screw?” – which, for those of you unaware of this fact, was the official love song of my ex-husband…which may have something to do with why he’s my ex.  Oh, look at that. The song is gone.  Now you have it.  Blessed relief.

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Columns 2006

The current mayoral campaign has yet to see me reaching for a gun

It will come as no surprise to anyone who knows me that I hold a particularly low opinion of political campaigns. I must confess, though, that the current campaign for Anchorage mayor has captured my heart because it is currently producing the only hot air to be found here this month.

I know political campaigns are critical to our democracy. And god knows there is no alternative out there for a “political campaign free” form of government that is in any way attractive to me.  But that doesn’t mean I have to love the oft times messy process that we

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While watching TV last night…

While watching TV last night I realized I could literally sense my brain cells screaming and dying from lack of anything that would feed them.  Thank god the Daily Show came on and saved me from total meltdown.

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Our spring snow is here

It is positively beautiful out. The new snow has covered all the ugly black ice that emerged over the past few weeks as spring prepared for breakup.  I guess it’s not really breakup unless the stuff melting is black and smelly.  In that category, Anchorage wins hands down for best breakup in the world.

But for just a few more weeks….days?…we have a magically white wonderland with the trees and bushes wearing crowns of white and even the old parked cars on people’s lawns taking on a not horribly ugly persona for a little while. 

Beauty is, after all, very,

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It’s been a rough weekend for Mr. T

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I guess you just get to an age where you want what’s familiar and all else is just annoying. I made the mistake of going out for a few hours last night. Mr. T is used to me being home in the evening since it’s universally known that I have no social life, preferring a hermit-like existence with my animals. So he did number one downstairs and number two upstairs. I guess that was his way of letting me know with absolute certainty that he was displeased. Since he’s 16, pretty blind and almost completely deaf, I guess I have

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Thank god the deed is done

I spent more on two outfits I bought yesterday than I have on clothes in the past two years.  But the deed is done.  The mission is accomplished. I have the outfit I will be buried in because trust me when I tell you I will never spend that much money on an article of clothing again.  I have the wedding outfit and the graduation outfit. In my world, that translates to having an outfit to wear after six and one to wear before six.  And I now officially declare my wallet and closet closed. 

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As I head out to shop

As I head out to shop, I have to ask exactly who made up these stupid fashion rules? Why can’t you wear stripes and plaids together? Why will the world end if I wear brown shoes with black pants?  Why the hell can’t I wear white after Labor Day?  Will the earth stop spinning? If I walk out in public dressed in pants with one pattern and a shirt in another will democracies fall?  And why does everyone but me think that a dressy sweatshirt is a contradiction in terms?

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