How to wake up in the morning

Stir slightly under the warm blankets. Slowly open your eyes. Find yourself staring into the faces of two dogs who sit right next to your bed in unblinking sentry pose waiting for you to get your lazy ass out of bed and feed them. Smell their fetid breath as they inch imperceptibly closer to the bed upon noticing your eyeball movement. Chose life over one more inhale of their exhale. Get up.