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Please don’t do that

There was an article in the paper yesterday about the latest in technology being little speakers to go with the I-Pods or whatever the hell it is that people are using to listen to music nowadays.  I only have this to say about that.  PLEASE DON’T!!!  PLEASE, OH PLEASE, OH PLEASE, DON’T!!  Isn’t there enough unnecessary noise in the world today? Don’t make me listen to your music whether it is a rap song about somebody’s ho or a ballad about somebody’s ….well, ho.  Keep it to youself.  Please.

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It’s almost over

Come Tuesday, our silly season will be over and we will advance to the really important stuff.  Or am I the only one who has noticed the sudden glut of toy commercials on TV?

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A question that must be asked

If eyebrows are the vestigial remnants of facial hair, what’s their purpose? Why did they remain after the other hair left?  What has ever been their point in life? What do they do for us that we kept them but got rid of the hair on our ears…well, at least, most of us got rid of ear hair.

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A mighty little radio station

KBRW, Barrow’s one and only radio station, is a public broadcasting station that is critical to the people of the north. It’s having its membership drive this week. If you are an old Barrowite reading this, you should consider making a pledge if only in memory of all those great Sunday evening singspirations you remember so well…or Cora singing Happy Birthday on the birthday program…or Johnny Adams singing “This Land is Your Land” in Inupiaq during local talent day.

And if you never have been to Barrow, consider pledging just for the boost it will give to your reputation to

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Columns 2006

America’s obesity obsession

I have spent most of my life fighting the battle of the bulge. I’ve done it for a variety of reasons. When I was young I did it because I was told men did not find “large” women attractive. Since I grew up in an era when it was more important for a woman to earn her MRS than her BS, this became a major issue in my youth.

As I aged, I fought the battle in an attempt to ward off the actual aging process. I come from the generation that said we should trust no one over 30.

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You know what scares me on Halloween?

A couple of nights ago I decided to ignore the falling snow and grill a kebob for dinner.  The grill is on my porch. I needed to change from my slippers to a pair of shoes. I went to my closet. There was a pair of black shoes and a pair of brown shoes, both of which would have been equally up to the snowy task.  The brown shoes are more comfortable. But I was wearing grey pants and a black shirt and black socks.  As much as I wanted to wear the brown shoes, I couldn’t get the image

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An observation

When boys are selling things at the store to raise money for a team or for the boy scouts, they tend to stand around joking, punching each other in the shoulders and looking as though the last thing on their mind is pushing their product. When girls are selling things for their team or the girl scouts, they seem much more focused on the task at hand and rarely let anyone go by without at least asking if they are interested in buying something. 

No moral here. Just something I’ve observed.

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You say torture, I say dunking

Dunking? Torture? Yes, I could not be prouder of our current leadership. With Bill Cinton we debated the meaning of the word “is”, With George Bush and his fun loving puppetmaster Dick Cheney, we debate the definition of torure.  I’d was less embarrassed by Bill Clinton’s cigar trick.

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A herding dog’s worse nightmare

Poor Blue is going crazy trying to figure out how to herd me, Blondie, the three birdcages downstairs and the two birdcages upstairs into the same general area so she can sleep soundly, knowing her job is done.  How do I tell her that even I can’t carry those cages up the stairs for her?  I’m hoping she’ll eventually figure out that the birds are already in safe “pens” for the night and she can relax.

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