Author: Elise Patkotak

While panicking over the poop coming… or not coming… out of my cockatoo’s butt, I noticed a background sound of Nayla coughing. She sounded like a kid with whooping cough. Except it never bothered her respiration and never seemed to interfere with her food intake (not unusual in this house – your death has to be pretty imminent before the appetite goes). I let it go a day or two and then felt the onset of mother guilt. Since CB’s butt was now considered clear and healed, I felt bad that I hadn’t paid more attention to the three day Continue reading →

A sink hole under the White House. A volcano erupting in Hawaii.  Already hurricane season in Florida. In case you don’t get it, the earth is vomiting forth its opinion of our leaders’s actions over the past year or so. Its judgement is not positive.

We have seen the POS currently sullying the White House reverse everything President Obama ever did to preserve our earth for future generations. POS is doing everything he can to kiss the ass of his extraction buddies without really giving a damn if he leaves anything but a wasteland for Eric and Don Jr. and Continue reading →

It’s no wonder the rest of the world is running from us as fast as they can. We are now conducting international diplomacy with a nuclear power by impulse. If it comes into his head, his tiny little fingers pound it out and hit send without giving it a second thought. I’m guessing that if anyone really wants a fence put up, it’s the rest of the world wanting to put a fence up around us so our insanity doesn’t spread. Ebola outbreaks may be horrifying but they take second place next to POS’ twitter outbreaks.

Oh yeah, speaking of Continue reading →

I care for and deeply love three parrots and a cockatoo. I am what might be called an over-the-top bird person. Have been so for almost fifty years.

So I am well aware that birds can be very fragile if they are ill or injured. I am also aware that birds will hide their illness until right before they drop dead so as not to be seen as the weak member of the flock.

Yesterday as I was doing the morning feeding I noticed that my bare-eyed cockatoo, CB, had a dirty, poopy bottom. Birds tend to keep themselves clean Continue reading →

I keep thinking of that racist idiot screaming at two women for speaking Spanish in a store in New York. If you’d come to my dad’s grocery store in the 1950s, you would have heard Italian spoken. It didn’t mean my parents or our customers were any less American. For so many, the journey here had not been easy. They had to have wanted it bad. They were fully committed to America.

So they came here and in building a new life in America, they kept some things that gave them comfort in a strange land. And they repaid that Continue reading →

So Dylan Farrow accuses Woody Allen of molesting her and is backed up by her brother – child genius, Pulitzer Prize winner and probably Frank Sinatra’s son – Ronan Farrow. Then Moses Farrow posts a blog in which he calls his mother, Mia Farrow, the abuser while claiming to be a family counselor.

Don’t know where Moses got his degree but I must say that most family counselors I know would not recommend this as a good way to start healing a family.

I feel sorry for the kids of famous people. It always looks like it would have to Continue reading →

We were looking pretty good for awhile. You know, after the war – and by that I mean the big one, the one we actually declared – but before the Shrub’s administration.

Oh how great life was. The richest people in America paid over 50% of their wealth in taxes and yet still had second homes and yachts. America’s working class could survive on one income. Workers had fought for and achieved benefits like health care and annual leave. Going to college didn’t involve going into a lifetime’s worth of debt. We were young. We were optimistic. We took the Continue reading →

Given this is the age of Me Too, I have to wonder what really happened at NCIS that caused the Abby character to depart. Not only did she depart, but she filmed no scenes with Mark Harmon for the last year or so. Even if they were supposed to be in a scene together, they filmed on different days. That makes me wonder. Makes me wonder a lot.

Remember when Zeva left? It was so weird. One day she’s there, next day she’s resigned. And no reason was ever given. She just disappeared into silent darkness.

Can you say Non Continue reading →

Here’s the statements he’s made as head of the NRA since our most recent school shooting – well, the most recent as of this writing.

“North called for metal detectors in schools and pushed the National Rifle Association’s ‘school shield’ agenda, which he said offers school’s a free security assessment that includes looking at how people enter and exit buildings.”

“North on Sunday also suggested that much or at least part of the problem with school shootings is young people, mostly males, being exposed to a culture of violence and being on Ritalin, a medication prescribed largely to help with Continue reading →

One must seriously question whether or not Don Jr. actually has a brain or whether he’s just a slightly creepy automaton meant to represent the hero of Bonfire of the Vanities.

Not only does he meet with foreign emissaries to influence our election – something any right thinking American would find highly reprehensible and criminal… well, any right thinking American that isn’t a brainwashed, drooling evangelical Christian who thinks only liberals can sin… but he writes about it, talks about it, friggin’ admits it! Does he really think he is American royalty sitting above the criminal justice system so that Continue reading →