I filed for my PFD yesterday. I did it online like so many Alaskans are doing. It’s so darn convenient. The easiest money most of us will ever make. Just point and click and VOILA! come this October, the state will give you free money. So while you’re earning these easy dollars, do yourself and our community a favor and choose to point and click on the arrow that lets you donate part of your PFD to one of the many charities listed on the website. It’s free money you and I haven’t really earned. And a little of it
I dream of a paperless society
I have the dreaded blue box out…the blue box my friend Janis got me to buy years ago when I bought my first house…the box I throw all my papers in all year that I think might be critical to save or use for taxes…and now the time I dread every year has arrived. I have to actually pull out the bulging wads of crumpled papers and make sense of them and wonder why I have so many receipts from so many vets and pet stores and wonder even further if that may be why I have lots of paper
Big penises
Maybe I am reaching the old prude stage. Maybe I just have some semblance of good taste left. Maybe I just reach the end of my rope faster now. But I am SOOOO tired of going to websites I visit regularly for any number of reasons…ok, they are mostly sites on Comics.com….and finding myself facing obnoxious ads about bigger penises. Do men not get that it’s not size that counts half as much as technique? I mean, how old do they have to be before it sinks in their tiny little brains that if they don’t know what to do
Just to clear up any confusion
The inductees into the permanent hall of infamy are the senators mentioned at the end of the column. All the others will just have to try a little harder next year.
I proudly present my 2008 Hall of Infamy
Following a time honored tradition, today’s column will reflect my selections for my annual Hall of Infamy. People, places and/or things inducted into this hall are those that annoyed and irritated me more than usual last year. As always, we will end the induction ceremony with another inductee retired to a permanent room of dishonor in the Hall.
People talking on cell phones get a nod in this column every year, but this year I want to be a little more specific and send out a Bronx raspberry to those people who talk into their phones via tiny sets stuck
Why should the year end any better than it started?
I finally got the meringue to whip up into peaks and made a gorgeous sugar free lemon meringue pie. Unfortunately, I’ll never know if it was also tasty because the tin pie plate folded in half as I took it out of the oven and it smashed to my floor and splatter into crevices I didn’t even know existed in my kitchen until I had to figure out how to clean them. I cleaned it up for the better part of 45 minutes and was proud that I’d managed to get the whole sticky mess taken care of and then
Meringues
Am I the only person in the world incapable of whipping egg whites into stiff peaks? Hell, I’ll even take soft peaks. I’ll take anything that even slightly resembles what the picture looks like.
Rock Me Sexy Jesus
How can you not like a movie whose main song is titled, “Rock Me, Sexy Jesus”. While I realize this may not be for everyone, I highly recommend Hamlet 2 to whoever can take a religious joke without taking offense and wants to laugh a lot.
Only 23 days left…..
…and our country will once again be free.
Here’s the difference
Here’s the difference between 16 and 60. When I was 16 and heard Jay and the Americans singing “She Cried” and it got to the line where he kissed her, a kiss that only meant goodbye, my eyes would tear up with romance and emotion. It was just too sad and heartbreaking. Now when I hear it at 60, all I can think is, “I hope it comes back and bites you in the butt, asshole.”